Thursday, 2 January 2014

Time to reconnect

Happy new year!!!

A lot has happened since I last wrote but to give a brief summary.....

January - We had our initial appointment with Fertility Associates (our nearest fertility specialists) where we were told that we would most probably need IVF to conceive.
March - Our newest goddaughter was born.
           - I quit my job and started a new one
August - B turned 30.
            - My brother got married.
September - I turned 25.
October - I went to Sydney to spend a few (amazing) days with my BFF.
              - We made the decision to tell B's parents that we will be doing IVF.
December - We said a very sad goodbye to my beloved ginger furbaby who we had to have put down :(

This is all between more tests and being poked and prodded, lots of hospital visits with my mum who is getting some treatments done and general friends and family hullabaloo.

I am still not pregnant. They still don't know why we can't conceive (the hsg came back clear) and my cycles are still ridiculous (up to 90 days) BUT we have hope. So much hope.

We are eligible for IVF in March 2014 which is approaching scarily quick. We will have our final appointment in February where we will find out what protocol (method) they will use and get all the training on how to administer the drugs (a lot of it you have to inject yourself).

I am scared. Like knee-shakey, sick-feeling-in-my-tummy type scared. I'm torn between being excited and making plans for our "baby" and being realistic and "playing it safe". I need to keep reminding myself that there is no right and wrong way to deal with these emotions, I just have to muck through as best as I can.

This year is going to be hectic. We have three weddings for friends, IVF and a trip to Fiji in the pipeline at the moment but I'm looking forward to grasping this year with both hands and enjoying it, after all, this time next year I could be in a totally different boat that is motherhood (all going well).

Tonight I will leave you with two photos....

My wee ginger girl, Nemo 

B and myself at my brothers wedding...

Until next time....hope, forgiveness and new beginnings.

Rachel x